Sometimes you have to laugh

There are times you have to laugh or you will cry. This saying is very true when you are dealing with a loved one with dementia.

My mother has dementia and is physically handicapped. Which means that there are many times that I have to tell myself to just laugh or to accept that she is not going to get better.

One thing I often have to remind myself of is that "life happens". Which to me means that you do what you can and don't worry about the rest. This is very true when dealing with Mom.

This doesn't mean that I do not get frustrated with her because I do. She could be doing better physically if she wanted to but she has convinced herself that many activities and almost all forms of exercise will make her sick so she will not do it. I keep telling myself that I can't make her do it, it is up to her.

At times Mom is very with it mentally and at others she seems like a bratty 5 year old. Since I never know which will be on the phone I have learned not to expect much.

I do feel guilty at times because Dad is the one who is having to carry the burden of dealing with her because my siblings and I do not live near them but they chose to live there just as the rest of us have chosen to live where we do.

I do remind myself when Mom is having a bad day that even if I lived closer it would not make a difference and my family comes first and there are times when I have to laugh because it is better than crying.